Monday, May 05, 2008

Let Me Not Ruin You!

There was a sinful situation I was involved in for a while; one I was going to be drowned in step by step. Whenever there was a 'signal' from Allah's side to avoid involving more and more, there were 'justifications' from my side not to follow.
On a Sunday night, the tomorrow of which I would be at the Holy Shrine of Imam Reza (AS), I stopped involving in the situation. To be honest, I had much internal conflict though I knew I did the right thing. I just feared the 'consequences'; I thought it would ruin many things.
The next day at the Holy Shrine I was worried I might spend my whole blessed day thinking on this. But quite miraculously, I was surrounded by events I had not enough time to think on that concerns. As an example, I met an old university friend after some years and began talking to him for a long time.
It was just the last minutes of my service when worries of the 'consequences' came to me again. Thinking on this for some minutes, I was made known that I was worrying about ruining 'myself', not any other thing. Getting this, I had tears in my eyes and said to Imam Reza (AS), 'My dear Imam! Let me ruin myself, but not ruin you. Let me break myself before ruining your reputation ...

3 comments:

otowi said...

May Allah swt make it easy for you, insha'allah.

Ahmad Abdollahzadeh said...

Thank you sister.
'And whoever is careful of (his duty to) Allah, He will make for him an outlet.' Holy Quran, 65:2
Please pray for me to be careful about my duties to Allah (swt).

otowi said...

Insha'allah - you have my prayers.

I've tagged you in my blog to make a post about your hopes:
http://masooma.blogspot.com/2008/05/hope.html